IF you can’t buy the idea of a Secret Service agent shooting Kennedy by accident, how about one who did so on purpose? Bill Cooper, an assassination buff from California, says that microanalysis of key frames from the famous Zapruder film shows the president’s limo driver, William Greer, allegedly whipping out a gun, turning quickly, shooting JFK, and the returning his attention to the road as if all was well.Well, no tip for him!

"It’s just ridiculous," says Robert T. Johnson of the AIC of this theory. "I’ve looked at those frames, it’s just an optical illusion created by sunlight glancing off the driver’s head and forehead, that’s all… the result isn’t even a good illusion. It’s a stretch to say it even looks like a gun. It actually looks like a cartoon of a gun." That’s not enough to please some theorists on this controversial bent.

They say that after the first bullet hit Kennedy, even if he didn’t take his own shot at the president, Greer appears to slow the limo down to almost a stop, wait for Kennedy to take another slug, and only then speed away. Some days, you just can’t win.